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June 22
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W |
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L |
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Pink Pistols
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3
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0
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Hula Honeys
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2
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1
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Camaro Harem
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1
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2
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CarnEvil
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0
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3
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Pink Pistols
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Pearl Handled
Number: .50 cal
With JCRG Since: 2010
Position: Blocker
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Bio: It all started decades ago, when a pair of chemically imbalanced Amway salespeople stole Pearl Handled from her crib and raised her in a suburban cage, grooming her to be the future Queen of Multi-Level Marketing. They soon learned that no one puts baby in a corner. Burning with passion and punk justice, Pearl pistol-whipped her first bully at age 9, and by age 13 had burned a Chuck E. Cheese to the ground. Reform school? Pearl tore through seven of 'em until they shackled her up in the basement of St. Bartholemew's School for Pristine Young Ladies, where they force-fed her arugula and brainwashed her with endless reruns of SWEET VALLEY HIGH. One fateful night, Pearl was visited by Alaeia, the Goddess of F!%@s S*!t Up, who broke open her chains, placed a revolver in her hand, and said unto her, "Thou shalt go out there and kick. Some. A@!." Pearl blew the doors off St. Bartholemew's and hit the streets with her six-shooter, dispensing just desserts across America to the sickos and perverts who bring women low. Soon after reuniting with her birth family, she found the Pink Pistols, and knew immediately that she had found her true home. Loyal, gritty, and determined, Pearl will take a piece out of anyone who takes aim at her teammates. When she's not busy b%^$*-whipping her opponents on the track, Pearl brings that same fierce loyalty to her Mother of Pearl and her daughter Mini. Off the track, Pearl lives her digits and doesn't take herself so damn seriously. But when the skates go on, the gloves come OFF!
Recognition: 2012: TEAM-Most Improved
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Back to Roster
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